You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
I wannas sexs uuuuu
Even my Mr Clean Magic Eraser can't make last night disappear.
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
Apparently tackling a bar stool and crashing to the floor while yelling for 6 shots of whiskey won't get you thrown out on St Pattys Day.
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
Also, just had a student offer to sell me Xanax. Want some? Just for like a rainy day. Or our memorial day shitshow. Or just another Wednesday night.
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
Randomize
