That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
You know it was a challenge blowing out the candles. It was hard to think of a wish, while drunk, with a concussion.
I definitely paid for a case and a fifth and all I got was 6 beers and a crown and coke. Wtf. Bar math sucks
I didn't even have time to sit down and the nurse was like: ''You've been having unprotected sex.'' HOW DOES SHE KNOW?!?
Technically my penis started a fight tonight
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
When I die, I want you to spread my ashes at a Cracker Barrel.
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
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