I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
You should probably wake up already as I have yet another story for you. Teaser? Blood from knife wound. Tequila. Guitar hero. Kitchen counter. Lawyer.
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
I considered my 2012 starting right when the cop followed the wrong car for the bottle rocket we shot at him
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
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