Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
The condom broke. Its OK tho, turns out I was just humping her thigh for 20 minutes. Jager dude, Jager.
I preemptively put on a cape before eating a bunch of weed brownies. Best decision ever.
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
Also. Picked being late to work over the maid finding my vibrator. Life choices....
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
It's not a hangover, it's "slept on a couch with another person and said person moves a lot and is loud"
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
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