do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
Just deleted any ex boyfriends and potential lovers from my phone in preparation for Vegas...
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
Do you want the really bad news or the bad news? Or do you want it in chronological order?
You probably don't remember. You were drunk and getting your tits drummed on like haitian bongos in a voodoo ritual.
I have no idea why I said that. I have no idea why anything happened last night, I broke my toaster making a egg. I'm going to quit drinking.
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
I'm sorry I get my lefts and rights confused because I'm dyslexic. But, it took you at least 15 minutes to figure out it wasn't your room OR YOUR HUSBAND.
Randomize
