i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
You can't just walk around stealing hats from drunk boys and peeing in bathtubs. Turn down.
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
You peed in my kitchen, while crying and insisting my floor was a toilet.
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
P.s. There are few things I love more than brand new mascara and you are one of them.
You did what with his pubic hair?
Randomize
