Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
make sure to take notes today. there is a guy in a wheelchair who might be getting a DUI from a cop on horseback. I'm gonna see this through.
I lost control in the snow and hit a parked car. I went into our building to get a pen and paper to leave a note and when I came back the car was gone and there was a hot girl there. I used the pen and paper to get her number.
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
Some kids in a school bus just saw me jacking off in my car. This is how 89% of children find out about sex.
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
my ex finally blocked me on all social media and tbh I'm only pissed because his roomate just got a puppy
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
My new gym is popular with trophy wives. They’re talking about yachts and plastic surgery
Learn their secrets! I want to meet men with Maseratis. The meat heads and Mustangs scene is getting old
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