So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
I still think it's messed up that you're naming your kids after all the guys you slept with in college
New plan for Halloween: you dress as Waldo, I'll dress as Carmen San Diego. We can just hide in a closet drinking till someone finds us.
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
Btw, you're my emergency contact at Planned Parenthood
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
Randomize
