Remember that time i walked in on your friend taking a huge shit?
Remember that time you hooked up with him?
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
Sorry my phone died because I decided charging my vibrator was way more important
Randomize
