Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
Always fun waking up to 911 as your last dialed call.
You broke into someone's house and stole a pan of lasagna.
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
I think you just described to us the most perfect drunken fairy tale that has somehow never been written
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
I'M NOT EVEN STOPPING FOR WINE SO I CAN GET TO THAT DICK QUICKER.
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
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