last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
But on the up side she uprooted a whole peony plant from the hotel downtown and said, "I brought you flowers"
ps I'm eating candy off our sex sheets. gotta say the only thing better than sweet tarts is sweet tarts with a hint of sex. perfect post vday situation
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
I'm going to sing sad and lonely Barbra Streisand songs at the top of my lungs if you don't get here soon
I'm not gonna lie. The only reason I haven't drank a whole bottle of crown tonight is because we only had 3/4 of a bottle left.
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
I just tried to snap you a picture of the CVS where we decided not to become parents.
Randomize
