So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
apparently i'm the only person who has heard from her since saturday. she texted me "burt reynolds" at 2am sunday
Apparently im getting a reputation for how i mix drinks. Im the midas of booze. Everything i touch turns to koolaid.
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
You're like my little fucked up version of the groundhog seeing its shadow, only it's boobs and warm weather.
We can't go out this weekend. My uterus is so desperate it's given me permanent beer goggles
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
Randomize
