there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
I don't think the cop knew you were on ecstasy until you asked for a back rub.
I smuggled my gin and tonic out of the bar by shoving the glass in my pocket...mistakes were inevitable.
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
Pitting the remainder of the bottle against my hangover. I'm expecting an all out cage match for my soul and wellbeing.
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
You decided that walking wasn't in the cards for you anymore
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
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