My chemistry professor just asked me if I ever found a ride home from the bar last Saturday
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks
40 year old guy made out with me last night while I had French fries in my mouth
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
I think this Canadian beach volleyball player might be my soulmate. We could check each other's shoulders for melanoma.
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
She flirted with a pilot and a frat boy at the airport in Vegas and told our bartender his mask matched her panties so yeah I’d say she’s rebounding from the divorce
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