Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
Im mastering the way to pass gas silently.
Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
He asked us to wake him up with a strobe light. We had it going in front of his face full power for half and hour and he didn't even blink.
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
After we finished having sex, he drunkenly tried to hugh five me, farted, then accused me of stealing his socks.
Went to bed in my room fully clothed, woke up naked in the kitchen with the dog looking unamused.
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
Randomize
