I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
His name was Kyle but I insisted on calling him baby Jesus all night and then we did a line and he bought me Taco Bell so idk
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
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