he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
...you put a chicken patty in my toaster last night..
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
My diabetic professor who apparently didn't eat anything all day keeps passing out. I gave him a joint. He's gonna be fine.
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
I should get him a card "thanks for letting me use you for your penis on and off as I see fit and for being a nice guy. My boobs and I appreciate your loyalty and dedication"
I'd like to preapologize if you or your mom see me naked at some point this weekend.
I just need to get a little drunker before I realize I'm not straight
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
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