He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
cat food counts as protein by the way
Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
You were laying next to me in bed at 4:30 a.m. I asked if you were drunk and you said you weren't drunk you were buzzed like a bumblebee. Then kept rambling on about having to call out of work.
Randomize
