I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
well i had to explain to their mom why the kids i babysit for won't stop repeating the phrase "nice juicy guido"
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
I'm officially removing you from my nudes recipient list on snapchat.
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
Randomize
