Thanks to blow jobs, my margarita's at the bar are only 3dollars.
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
i looked at my phone & had a message that said "tell your friend she needs to clean my livingroom, i dont appreciate her trying to turn it into a bubblebath." I give you probs.
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
We decided to make playlists for each other. Do you know any songs that say "sorry I'm not as hot as your prostitute ex?"
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
Drake has all the answers
Xanax, wine, and giving the neighbor blue balls. How about you?
Jesus, it’s Tuesday morning! Not back stage with Motley Crew
Randomize
