What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
I wish the health center treadmills counted beers burned not calories
Watching the 1st game of the world cup. I'll drunk dial you at 8:30 to wake you up for work.
I'm puking to John Mayor, save me. Or at least change it to somethong beyyt
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
walk of shame into the pharmacy with a busted up chin and laughing the lady at the counter rolled her eyes at me when I asked for the morning after pill.
I'm trying to figure if this dude sitting in his car with the door open is dead or just sleeping. Someone was probably wondering the same thing bout me 20 minutes ago. Your meeting is taking a ridiculous amount of time.
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
Randomize
