were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
No more Irish car bombs ever.
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
She literally just changed his birthday. Overly attached girlfriend has nothing on her.
So guess who got away with telling their girlfriend she's insane multiple times in a Valentine's day card. Yup, this guy.
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
Randomize