Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
So bad night, ended up beating off to porn and eating Keebler elf cookies.... at the same time :-(
my fart just smelled so bad i acutally gagged
just because you are now my girlfriend does not mean you can text me nasty shit
She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
just did awkward shuffle by the bagels in the dining hall at 7:30 AM with a kid i've hooked up with. goodbye freshman year.
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
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