come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
im proctoring the SATs right now and im still drunk from last night. i really wanna tell these kids that this fucking test doest mean shit and they will just be constantly drunk once in college.
Did I show you my penis last night?
Hippo gnu deer
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
like a dude with a badge in a golf cart is gunna do shit. Unless he has a tazer. Then it's fair game.
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
Feels like someone put a cigar out where my butthole used to live
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
Randomize
