I enjoy that i have a whole shelf of clothes that I've accumulated from random sex. You know the ones you get to make the morning after look less awkward like similar to an athletes trophy shelf
I woke up and peed for 26 seconds this morning. 26 seconds!
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
you will always have a special place in my vag
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
Wearing a shark mask, slugging tequilla, in cowboy boots, and not minding that my spandex is on backwards. What are you up to?
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
Before he gave me the breathelizer, he told me to "blow like you're blowing your boyfriend". I like him. My tax dollars are well spent
Randomize
