normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
is there anything more depressing than unpacking condoms from your suitcase that you thought you were going to use on vacation?
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur
I can't break up with him, I ran the math. Taking into account his 7 inch penis and the standard deviation from average, almost 90% of guys should have a smaller penis than he does.
Really? Penis math? This is why guys shouldn't date female engineers.
This bitch flirting at the bar needs to close her legs and open up a book. I can literally feel my IQ dropping every time she bends down to show her tits.
Jealous?
Very.
I'm the one on the patio wearing underwear. Holding a pipe. Pigtail and glasses. Can't miss me.
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
I can't believe I'm coordinating a threesome at work. My productivity is at an all time low.
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
all my friends are getting married and here i am in a committed relationship with rum
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