Im listening to a jazz version of dick in a box.
And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
My balls are so social today.
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
i'm not sure when it happened but apparently now it's topless bar night, im wearing a leotard and everyone is looking at me like i'm cheating.
I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
You screamed 'no, YOU put some pants on' at a cop. I pretended not to know you.
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
Just kidding. Don't worry, you're getting sugar and orgasms for Valentine's day.
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
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