Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
I bought a police grade breathalyzer on ebay at 4:37 am. At least I'm a responsible drunk.
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
Just got hit on by a 28-year old, quadraplegic, triple-cancer-survivor redneck. Now updating bucket list to meet newfound standards.
You cannot ask her to resend the picture of her genital tattoo to you just so you can show your room mate. it is time to end your relationship with the Captain.
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
Randomize