why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
Played "Which Couple Will Take Me Home Tonight" at the bar last night... I can now cross three-some off my bucket list
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
So apparently after I spilled candle wax down the front of my pants, I went to the store, bought condoms, and passed them out to everyone at the bar.
I thought they were lying to me about the condoms, until I found the receipt in my pocket.
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
So he cheated on his gf again. For the third time. Second time with me. HE CRIED WHILE DRIVING ME HOME BECAUSE HE CHEATED ON HER. And I laughed the entire way. Good god I'm an asshole.
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
I came twice and when I was done I petted his head and said "you did good kid you did good" and just laid back smiling. Tell me I'm not awesome.
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
Randomize
