five shots of tequila, anal and 3 cigarettes. not my best idea on a saturday afternoon.
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
I'm going to start giving girls scratch off lottery tickets when they leave my place in the am. That way they have a chance of not regretting the night before
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
Screaming "dámelo" at the bottle of scotch was definitely my best and worst moment of Cinco de Mayo 2015.
Never start off a conversation with "speaking of STD's..."
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
Randomize
