we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
I seriously just caught my 15 year old little sister with a positive pregnancy test coming out of the bathroom. Honest to God.
I have a coat hanger and a baseball bat. Her choice.
I am getting my wife a tattoo just above her butthole that says, "For entry just add tequila."
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
Woah there. I lasted a semester and a fourth of college not having sex. trust me when i say keeping my virginity was an obstacle course of olympic proportions.
The virgin olympics. I would win the gold. For America.
No dude I got way too drunk to function. 90% sure I tried to FaceTime 911.
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
I'm sobbing to NWA
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
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