Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
I shouldn't be home alone with this much peanut butter and the dog. I feel like i'm being recorded to see when my desperation will peak.
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
I legitimately had a champagne shower last night at a rave. I was also carrying around two bananas in my pockets like guns. Drunk doesn't even. Begin to explain My night.
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
I told her my cab was outside the club and that I had to go, but I think we both knew this wasn't going anywhere past the sloppy bathroom handjob.
Randomize
