genius idea. im gonna paint my penis green like the serpent of sex
just added God to my list of friends who can only see my limited profile on facebook. its such a relief to know that He can't watch me fuck up my life anymore.
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
Im pretty sure it started going awry when I asked their mom "How much would it cost me to sleep with your daughters"
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
You were dancing to the Bee Gees, at 3am, with a piece of ham on your head. Moral of the story, You can't drink.
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
Just told my dad about my heroic mailbox showdown. He looked at me strange. I think he thinks I'm high.
You are high.
Randomize