I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
the dude from the bar called to tell his mom about me immediately after we finished PLEASE COME GET ME
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
Ur gonna wake up early as dick tomorrow to do some responsible shit but im the one up at 3 am right now cooking brats soaked in keystone light so fuck your falling asleep ass bitch
Before you even think your day was worse than mine, I had to disinfect and and stitch another dude's penis after his prince Albert got ripped out by an angry chick.
I just found a casserole dish in my oven filled with broken glass, blood, and chopsticks. And the REALLY fucked up thing is that finding it answered more questions than it raised.
At second job interview this week. Wearing pants to hide pole dancing bruises. This my life.
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
IF YOU HAVE THE CHANCE TO HIT THAT, AND YOU DON'T, I WILL FUCKING CRUCIFY YOU.
You're such a supportive sister.
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
is it fun? or sober?
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
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