It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
he wasnt into me til he saw how good i was at ms pacman. wtf why does this always happen? when she kisses pacman it was a little awkward, so i made my move. i went for more than one kind of banana last night!
my one-armed grandma is doing the YMCA. you figure it out.
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
You threw a shot glass at the bartender and still managed to convince him to let us drink more. You are my hero.
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
he looked at me and said 'happiness is a warm blanket' then stole my vodka.
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
I have only made 3 good decisions in my life and getting really stoned reenacting the Lion King with my cat in a lion mane hat is 2 of them.
Randomize
