Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
You had one beer and one beer can full of vodka and you took a huge gulp of one of them and called it Emily Roulette
You know he really cares when he gives you one of those on-the-go toothbrushes for your walk of shame before running to work
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
At first I was a little embarrassed for sharting, but then i realized it was a bachelor party, and I went balls to the wall
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
Randomize
