quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
tonight would not even compare to the night i tried to pee in the living room
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
Either these are mashed potatoes in my pants, or I was drunker than I thought.
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
As I was leaving the drunk tank the cop told me he had a feeling we would be meeting again real soon.
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
I just turned down the best booty call of my life because I have to make a cheesecake. I guess this is growing up.
How I know I would be an awful mother....I just stirred the bong up with a baby fork. A literal baby fork....
A condom was pulled out of your vagina by a doctor today I do not think you can pull off "closet" hoe anymore
I just discovered my new vice. Cotton candy vodka. Its like a carnival in my mouth, puking of the tilt-a-whirl included.
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
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