Cops are here now. U need to come back. Ur not under arrest. But u need to apologize to the woman for what you did to her cat.
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
Nothing like all your friends getting engaged to remind you how much fun sleeping around is.
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
Every girl my sister has brought home from college I've had sex with, check and mate motherfucker
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
Randomize
