ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
Did I get blown in the bathroom? Yes. Did she throw up cranberry juice on my shorts? Yes. Did she finish the job? Yes.
I just watered my plants with apple juice. Look what you made me do.
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
On the plus side this hangover is the tipping point that finally convinced my lazy ass to get some sunglasses.
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
i accidentally sent all my draft messages..how do i do damage control for the multiple "fuck me now" type msgs sent at ten am?
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
She bent over while grinding on me on the dance floor and her thong straps were hanging out, I thought it was a good idea to grab the straps with both hands and pretend to be riding in Santa's sleigh...not my brightest moment.
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
APPARENTLY I MISSED SOMEONE SWALLOWING A WHOLE BAG OF METH WHILE I WAS ON BREAK.
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