Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
my soul wont recognize me after tonight
I'm about to take my first shit since thursday. I'm scared. pray for me. If I don't make it, tell my family I love them.
I'm home and safer than post-menopausal sex; you're welcome for the image. And yes, I did just use a semi-colon hammered.
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
I just gave my mom some ones that look like they've probably been in some strippers cooter. Oops.
Haha. Just tell your mom not to smell them
Hey mom, most of this money I'm giving you is in ones. Don't ask why and whatever you do don't smell them.
Sounds legit to me.
At the bar, some guy bumped into you and you screamed "hey, don't touch what you can't afford sunshine!"
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
Randomize
