I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
You snapped me at 3am drunk laying on your floor asking if I knew how we couldn't have predicted the housing crisis.
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
You fucked him, didn’t you?
He showed up at my house with tacos, rum and a negative Covid test. Of course I fucked him. I’m just a simple girl that likes tacos, not Margaret Thatcher!
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