Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
I got really upset about missing him last night when I was demonstrating penis sizes of the people I've slept with using a tape measurer to my roommates
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
I'm so festive that I used my jack o lantern bucket as a just in case barf bin
I just gave a fucking twenty minute blowiob.. I'm a GOOD girlfriend.
I hate when he takes the condom off to cum all over me. It defeats the purpose.
It’s like having a barf bag and choosing to puke in your own lap.
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