that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
I was holding her hair back and when she quit puking she told me she's been saving her scissor virginity for me.
2 rounds of irish car bombs have already been taken to your 5 year sober anniversary
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
He's a Shit stain on my heart
But see that's the thing. I know i'm better looking than you, I just want you to be continually in a state of shock and awe that you could ever get a girlfriend this hot. You know?
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
I went to smoke a bowl and realized that my lighter is out and there's still frozen blueberries in my bong... I need to reevaluate my life...
Update on my sex life: my calves are sore from masturbating too much. It's a thing. Look it up.
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
Randomize
