I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
He just asked me if I ever had the urge to put a zucchini in my ass.
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
Just FYI, I'm breaking up with my boyfriend tonight and you need to be on call to be my first rebound bang
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
in a last ditch attempt to make life awkward after i die today i want to be buried naked and have an open casket funeral.
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
Don't judge me. It's a Monday night and I can eat burritos in while bathing in the kitchen sink if I want to.
Can't talk, ducks in the car
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
Apparently I was carrying around a bottle of listerine calling it 5 loco
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