we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
And on that day, Satan said; "Let there be the friend zone and let us get fucking high." while Jesus silently cried in the background.
Is there a reason there's a dick print on my seventh-story window?
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
Just brought out that old CCM hockey helmet. The one covered in sharpie penises with "DRUNK BUCKET" written across the front. The number of tally marks / initials from tonight's drunk stunts alone is equal parts inspiring and alarming.
There's nothing more awkward than going on a beer run with 3 ten year olds....teacher of the year right here!
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
I'M GOING TO FUCK AN ENTIRE ORCHESTRA AND NOTHING CAN STOP ME
The band club does not count as an orchestra
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
Randomize
