sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
A lesson I learned in the hospital....when you masturbate while attached to a heart monitor, it scares the nurses a lot.
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
If making out with three guys at once at a Kesha concert while simultaneously smearing glitter all over yourself doesn't convince her you're gay, nothing will
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
I'm drinking on a Thursday because I can
Today is Wednesday you jobless drunk
I need to find a more reliable booty-call so I can start dating people and take it slow.
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
Randomize
