Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
Exactly how does jacking off in my purse count as a 'early christmas present'?
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
painting my nails while super high-drunk. Ended up painting my entire hands. Both.
My boobs just got me out of my third ticket last night
i'm so proud. i woke up to nearly seven feet of basketball player in my bed this morning
you win. again.
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
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