I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
Only you could go on vacation to visit family and hook up with a pro NFL player from Tinder
I just opened a beer with a child's toy at a 5 year olds birthday....can you look up the next AA meeting?!!
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
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