ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
I have surprise drugs for everyone
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
The cop left me alone after I gave her my spare snow cone. It was a hot and humid day and that uniform looked stuffy. Yay stoner me for overindulging in icy treats.
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
How was the party
I came home with only one shoe, a t shirt tied around my shoeless foot and I was covered in motor oil. Oh and my shorts were inside out. So you tell me
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
Randomize
