4:25 am: I want you here. Ugh.
I love you
are you drunk
yes but I def love you, we should get married
But I'm Jewish
embrace Jesus
Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
I was high enough to think chocolate sauce on bagel bites was a good idea
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
When I woke up my bed had been moved to the middle of my living room, a hippie was spooning me on one side and a pile of cocaine on the other, did I go through a time warp or are we still in 2012?
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
I'm going to need you to stop harassing my professor on Twitter when you're drunk.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
Randomize
