why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
I realized courtney is my jiminy cricket but instead of preventing me from telling lies she prevents me from fucking strangers
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
You kept screaming how great you were at drawing poptarts and you insisted on drawing them all over my forearm
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
Saved a second guy who was crying/on the verge of wigging out. Just call me the drug whisperer.
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
Im part way to drunk.
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
He flipped me around so that we could have sex and both watch Die Hard... I think I found my sole mate. Merry Christmas to me!!🎄
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